The Last Sin

[REVENGE]

God, what does this make, like... the 7th MCR-Fic I've posted here? xP Anyway, this is yet another I've started for another forum. I'm having loads of fun writing it - I hope you have just as much fun reading it. Ugh, and if you read it, please comment - it's extremely depressing seeing loads of views and no posts. With that said, let us begin. :]

-----
Prologue - Page 1
Chapter 1 - Page 1
Chapter 2 - Page 1
Chapter 3 - Page 1
Chapter 4 - Page 1
Chapter 5 - Page 1
Chapter 6 - Page 1
Chapter 7 - Page 1
Chapter 8 - Page 1
Chapter 9 - Page 1
Chapter 10 - Page 2
Chapter 11 - Page 2
-----

Prologue

Death is only the beginning.



This can’t be happening. This just can’t be f---ing happening…

The thunder was echoing around the Way household and the lightening was flashing violently, as if in ambience to the horrible scene taking place within. Gerard was still beating against the bedroom door, tears streaming down his frightened face as his brother’s voice could be heard over the roar of the storm, mumbling to himself. “Mikey, OPEN THE F---ING DOOR! Please, oh my god, DON’T DO THIS!” A drunken slur of words radiated from under the locked door – the barrier between Gerard and his suicidal brother. “No… this is it… leave me the hell-lone Gerrrard…” Gerard gave up trying to reason with him, and instead started beating frantically at the old splintery door, pounding away at it until fragments of wood entered his fists like needles and blood started to smear across the door like a morbid painting.

As he began ramming his shoulder against it in an attempt to break it down, a gunshot pierced the storm’s rage so close to the door that it caused Gerard, in surprise and agony, to jump away – and then he began to scream, ever more tears running down his glistening pale face and dripping from his chin. He turned and let his back slide down the door for support as he sat down and held his hand against his mouth. How did this happen so quickly? Why my f---ing little brother for God’s sake? Gerard’s thoughts led him back to two days prior – when Alicia had apparently been overcome by a nervous breakdown because of something that he wasn’t quite clear on, and had decided to leave Mikey. Needless to say, Mikey hadn’t taken it well – but he hadn’t become suicidal until he had gotten drunk and his judgment had failed him.

Now, as Gerard leaned against the door and tried to keep from going insane, there was no fixing it. Michael Way had killed himself in the home he had grown up in, in the very bedroom he had slept in as a child. His older brother had thought that perhaps a few beers would be just the thing to get his mind off of it, to clear some of the pain – but Mikey had drunk more than a few, and now Gerard felt his brother’s death resting on his shoulders. It’s ALL my f---ing fault… he hadn’t even mentioned alcohol until I suggested it…

Gerard would never come to out live this day. It would haunt him in nightmares and perhaps lead to his own eventual demise. As the pain wrapped around his heart and tightened violently, as the shocking emptiness of the loss struck him with full intensity, he failed to notice the blood that was running out from under the door and seeping into the seat of his jeans – the last sin of Michael Way.

[REVENGE]

Disclaimer: The following chapter has derogatory scenes regarding God, The Bible, and the Christian religion. If you are offended by any of the above, continue reading at your own risk.

Chapter 1

The rain was still coming down from the heavens as the funeral took place – it was almost as if it was trying to wash away the pain from the people standing in front of the coffin in the rain, black clothing matching their agonized expressions. The majority of the people listening to the priest talk of Mikey’s life had dark circles under their eyes – many of them were merely haunted by the terrible fate that had consumed him. As Gerard let the rain run down his face, concealing his tears from those around him, he wasn’t listening to what the priest had to say about the life of his brother. Instead, he was being eaten alive from the inside, the memory of what Michael Way’s remains had looked like when removed from his old bedroom haunting him– the reason his casket doors were closed from view.

It had been unlike anything Gerard had ever seen – he’d saw a number of horror films, of course – but nothing could compare with seeing someone you love mangled and distorted into something other than themselves. For some reason, he began getting the strangest feeling that Mikey was watching him, knowing that he wasn’t listening to his last rites. Knowing that he wasn’t really paying any attention at all. Goose flesh rose on his skin, and the hair on the back of his neck grew straight as he visualized his brother standing behind him, blood running from underneath his chin where the bullet had entered. He saw Mikey’s eyes roll back in their sockets as if trying to stray elsewhere, to see other things, revealing the whites and the irritated red veins as if it was mere child’s play. Then, most disturbingly of all, he saw his brother turn to reveal the hole in his head where the bullet had left, taking a bit of his thoughts and life with it.

Gerard whipped around, shaking slightly as he did so – only to see that the only person behind him was a woman wearing a black dress and veil, her weeping audible over the priest. Alicia. He turned back around as his expression hardened into rage and hatred – after all, she was the only other person he could really blame for Mikey’s death, and carrying it all alone was becoming quite the burden. Blaming someone else was always much easier.

When the burial had finally finished, Gerard was walking away from all the people he knew, trying to escape all the pain and condolences when Priest Williams walked up behind him and asked if he could have a word with him inside the church. “Oh… I… I don’t know, I was just going to go home and… sleep or something.” Actually, he’d had his eye on some sleeping pills – he’d been thinking if he were lucky, it would put him to sleep and never let him wake up again. “It will only take a moment – please, I’d really like to speak to you. I’m quite worried.” Gerard glumly agreed, and followed the priest into the church without really paying attention to the real world – it was as if a fog had descended around him, and soon he would just wake up from all of it.

Williams started off quietly as he shut the doors behind them, and then as he spoke, he grew in volume – and confidence, Gerard guessed. When he was in his church, he probably felt invincible. “I’m worried about you, as I always worry for family members who have to deal with suicide – with [b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b]ation. Sometimes it’s quite hard living with the fact that a loved one has to pay for their sins in such a terrible way, and… I’ve seen other people make the same mistake as their loved one did, trying to escape from it. I’m only trying to ensure that you won’t make the same mistake your brother did.”

The church was beautiful. The stained glass, the rows and rows of pews, the candles lit with their hypnotic flames swaying back and forth in the nonexistent breeze – but none of this could calm Gerard as his rage took hold of him. “My brother is NOT [b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b]ED!” His voice continued to rise as he spoke to the priest, his tones echoing off the tall vaulted ceiling as he did so. “He might’ve killed himself, but if that’s a f---ing unforgivable thing, then I don’t want to believe in such a God! If that’s the case, we’re better off WITHOUT ONE!” Williams was clearly awestruck – he had perhaps expected a bit of shock or anger from Gerard, but nothing this extreme. Not cursing God in his own church.

“Be careful of what you say, young man. Sins are always paid for in full debt when it’s all said and done.” The two men had been walking across the church, and by this time had made it to the very front where the alter stood tall, mighty, and almost accusingly – accusing Gerard of the sin that was in play, warning him of what he was saying, telling him to repent now or pay later. “I don’t give a s--t. Telling me to come in here just to tell me that you think my brother is in hell isn’t much of a f---ing condolence, you know. F--- God and f--- you. My brother’s in heaven where he belongs.”

Williams sighed. “Don’t try to fool yourself, Gerard. This isn’t a game – saying something like that can get you in troubling waters. God loves you, you know – there’s no need to—“ “To what? To OVERREACT?” A bible with a blue hardback covering and a golden cross on the front was sitting innocently on one of the front pews, and Gerard grabbed it with disgust. “This book can rot in it’s own f---ing hell – my brother doesn’t deserve this s--t, and he doesn’t deserve to be spoken of like this.” Before Williams could stop him, he opened the book and tore into the pages, tearing them from their binding and letting them fall to the floor. “There’s what I think about your f---ing hell.”

Gerard walked out of the church without another word, leaving Williams to his thoughts and the torn pages of the Bible littering the floor – he merely shook his head in disbelief and sympathy for Gerard as he thought of what the consequences of such severe actions would be. But the man who had ripped pages from the Bible was already in pain – not because of the actions he had preformed, but because of the images that were plaguing his mind, leaving him unable to think straight and causing goose bumps to remain on his arms almost as if they were an original part of them. You’re not in hell Mikey – you can’t be. You were too good a person… that just wouldn’t be fair would it? But the flames that surrounded the undead brother of his thoughts stated otherwise.

[REVENGE]

Chapter 2

The following morning, life felt like more of a burden than a blessing to Gerard. The mere task of breathing seemed like more than he could handle, and he had much more than that to worry about. Sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of untouched coffee in front of him, he was having to give the guys of My Chemical Romance the only clear solution he could think of for the good of the band. “This is… this is the end of MCR guys. I don’t know what else to do but quit – I can’t go up on stage and sing the songs this band created knowing that we have a permanent replacement in the band, knowing that Mikey is gone. Everything reminds me of him already, and being in a band that bears a name that he created would only make it all the more painful. Maybe after a while we could try again, but as of now…”

Gerard sighed, and looked up from his cup of coffee to the faces sitting around him, circles under their eyes and understanding within them. Frank was the first to break the silence. “Don’t worry… we understand. The fans will understand too.” Ray and Bob nodded, not really looking Gerard directly in the eyes. But he already knew what the news was saying – and what some of the fans were saying. Several had been interviewed, especially on the local news channels, and there was a rumor going around that Gerard himself had killed Michael Way. Earlier this morning he had been watching television only to find the very thing he was trying so desperately to escape from, only in an even more twisted manner. Other fans were arguing that though Gerard had been in the house alone with Mikey, he had only been trying to get him help, trying to save him. Bless those fans, he had thought to himself.

“Honestly Gerard… we’re not ready to play again either. We loved him too, you know.” Bob’s eyes were glazed over, almost as if he were about to break into tears – all of them had at some point or another. Ray nodded again, still unable to speak. After a few minutes of silence, however, he spoke in a quiet, timid voice. “I’m… I’m gonna go now guys… I’ll see you later…” Without waiting for any goodbyes, he walked out of the kitchen and into the living room, out of their sight – shortly afterwards, they heard the front door open and then click shut. Bob smiled slightly, and then followed Ray out of the house – Gerard didn’t try to stop them. He’d told them all he needed to, and it was easier to try and forget the pain when they weren’t around – there was a tapestry of memories that had been woven between them over the years, and unfortunately, Mikey was a part of the tapestry.

He took the first drink from the coffee in front of him without tasting it as Frank started talking to him – talking to him about the sorest of subjects. “Mikey’s in a better place now, you know. No pain, no tears, no-“ “That’s not what the priest thinks. That’s not what the Bible thinks.” Frank paused as Gerard grew silent, trying to choose his words carefully. Then, in a very quiet voice, he said, “Do you believe in hell?”

“I… I don’t… know.” This questioned had never really been posed to him so directly – just the thought of a place where millions of souls rotted for all eternity made him nervous, especially when his own brother was one posed to be rotting there. Frank opened his mouth to say something, but Gerard quickly interrupted – he couldn’t handle these kinds of conversations right now. “I need to get away. Somewhere far away, where things don’t remind me of him as much. Where I can just be alone and think.”

“What about like… a forest? You know, those places you see on television that are supposed to be so relaxing and nice. My cousin Benjamin spread his grandmother’s ashes in a forest in New York somewhere – he said that the serenity of it helped him cope with his loss. … Maybe it would be good for you too?”

Gerard hesitated. “I don’t know… forests haven’t really been my thing. I mean, it’s nice if you like it, but I’ve always been an urban type of guy...” Frank’s facial expression lightened slightly – this change in conversation from hell to forests was easing them both. “Well, maybe that’s your problem. Go experience something new and it might help. It’s not like Jersey won’t be here when you get back – hell, we leave for months at a time and it never leaves.” Frank flashed his signature smile at his friend, and then proceeded to leave as Ray and Bob had, leaving Gerard to his thoughts.

[REVENGE]

Chapter 3


One week later, Gerard was walking among the wilting leaves of Reinfield Forest in New York State. His car was parked not far behind him on the side of the dirt road that had led him here, in this leafy seclusion. The sun filtered in between the trees, causing shadows to dance underneath his feet as he walked and attempted to clear his mind. After all, that’s what it was all about – forcing the pain away, if only for a short while.

Gerard was doing extremely well under the circumstances – he was focusing on the hues of the leaves that surrounded him atop tree branches and littered the ground. He looked back once or twice to be sure the car was still somewhat in sight, and when he had assured himself he wouldn’t become lost he continued on, humming gently to himself a tune that he couldn’t identify. Gerard realized as he walked that no one else was around – he assumed that since it was a Tuesday, not many people would be out and about due to work. Although his mind had been elsewhere, he got only a few yards farther until it hit him again, with the same level of intensity as before. I’m never talking to Mikey ever again… never watching a horror movie with him again… never having a coffee with him again…

He sat down on the leaf-covered ground and started to weep. Even this place that I’ve never set foot in can’t keep Mikey at bay. The concept of hell entered his mind again, but somehow he managed to shoo it away before it did anymore damage. Did I seriously rip up a [b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b] Bible? What the f--- is wrong with me? I’ve never been very religious, but… Gerard’s thoughts were interrupted by the tickling sensation that rippled up the skin of his arm from its source at his hand. He looked down at it only to find a millipede using its curvy yellow legs to pull its gleaming red body up his own, as if seeking refuge from the ground itself. Gerard shook it off in disgust with a cringe and watched as it flew into the air and landed off to his right – among many other insects of many different varieties.

The ground around him was littered with them, creepy crawlies of all different kinds working their way over and under leaves – and all of them were going in the same direction. All of them were making their way to his right. Earthworms had left their homes in the soil and were now twitching and writhing almost fearfully as they tried to keep up with the pace of the other insects. Gerard stood up hastily before any more could try and climb atop him, and as he stood wondering what the hell was going on, he had to shake his legs every few seconds to keep them at bay.

What the hell are they all trying to get away from? He looked to the left and saw nothing – it was as if they were trying to escape from something that wasn’t even there. He started to follow the insects – but then a deep curiosity overcame him. After all, it wasn’t as if he really had the will to live anymore – being killed by some invisible poison would be more of a relief than something to fear.

Gerard walked in the opposite direction of all the things that crawling and writhed beneath his feet, cringing almost every time he heard the sickening crunch as he stepped on four or five of them at a time. Soon he came to three large boulder-like rocks that had been placed beside one another, looking extremely misplaced among all the trees and greenery. He gave it a short look of interest, and then continued on his way – until he heard a moan from beneath the gray stone. Until he saw what crawled from underneath – until he saw what the creatures had all been trying to get away from.

The man, or at least what looked like it had been a man at one point in time, was moaning and writhing on the ground in unseen agony, his mouth agape as he struggled from what had no doubt been his home. Pale skin hung from his flesh like loose clothing and blue veins spider webbed all over his body, showing vibrantly as if he was transparent. His hand out stretched and began reaching towards Gerard, though he was still several feet away – revealing the black, rotted fingernails that curved and pointed menacingly. The man’s hair had been drained of color, leaving white wisps atop his head and a few from his chin. “Pleeasee… get away…” His voice was horrifying – as broken and chapped as his lips. “Leaveee… please… you’re… hurting meee…”

Something took hold of Gerard’s body as he walked closer to the man, telling him that he could get help and everything would be fine – after all, why else would he have done such a thing? Was it to help someone in a way that he had not been able to help his brother? The man was hideously thin, his rib bones pressing against his flesh as if longing to burst free from their prison. “No… pleaaassee… get away from meee…”

“Everything will be fine – we just need to get you to a hospital. Come here, I can help you – take my hand.” Tears began streaming down the man’s face as he continued to plead for Gerard to leave. But Gerard wouldn’t listen – he bent down close to the man, trying to grab his hand as the man whipped it away from him. “Pleaaasee… I can’t… hold on… much longerrrr…”

Suddenly, fiery pain spread throughout Gerard’s entire being – his insides felt aflame, burning like the candles in the church that he had sinned in. He felt blood run from his neck as the man ripped away at it with his teeth, screaming and crying inhumanly as he did so. Gerard beat at the man’s head with his fists, trying to break free, trying to get relief, trying to get away from the pain.

Finally, the man fell to the ground, Gerard’s blood running eerily from his mouth and staining his pale flesh. Before anything else could be done, he crawled quickly into the rocks where he had come from, leaving Gerard to grasp at his neck with his hands and scream almost as loudly as the night Mikey had committed suicide. Gerard’s eyes were wide and his breathing was heavy as he ran from the forest, now taking no notice to the insects he crushed. Behind him he could hear weeping echoing within a rocky crevice…

[REVENGE]

Chapter 4

The world tilted and spun before Gerard’s eyes as he drove towards the hotel that he could rest in, where he could think. The vehicles that passed around him were colorful blurs that sped past without a second look or thought – and somehow, he knew that something was terribly, terribly wrong. The way he felt so desperately cold, yet at the same time his insides felt aflame; the motion of the things around him, even the things that were idle; and the way that he felt like such a train wreck, feeling so many emotions at once that it was unexplainable.

It was a miracle that he could stay on the road, a blessing that he could see at all. He looked to his left for a moment to see a dark green van rolling along beside him on the interstate - and the young girl with light blonde hair in curls in the back crying uncontrollably. Gerard’s head was throbbing,

Where’s my dolly, I want my dolly!

And he realized that

No, please, I saw her on the bathroom sink, we have to

Soon he would

GO BACK AND GET MY DOLLY!

Run off the road.

“WHAT THE F--- IS GOING ON?” He screamed aloud, realizing that the very throbbing in his head that pained him so badly was the sound of a young girl’s voice, begging and pleading for her lost doll. He gripped the steering wheel of his silver Mustang with rage and fear, unable to comprehend what he was feeling. Gerard felt hopeless and desperate, but not because of any logical reason like the remembrance of his dead brother – but because he was feeling the pain of a four-year-old girl who wanted her Barbie back.

Am I really f---ing going insane? Am I losing it? The green van passed him and went on its merry way, along with the throbbing in his skull. Taking its place was a small red BMW Beetle, a young woman in the driver’s seat chatting away happily on her cell phone. Gerard waited for it, for the throbbing in his head, having to listen to whatever nonsense she was talking about and feel her oblivious young emotion – but felt nothing. Okay… maybe… maybe it was just a one-time thing… maybe I just sorta lost it, and now I’m okay again…

Faint sirens arose behind him and within a few minutes grew loud as an ambulance sped through the traffic, flashing lights reflecting off of the surrounding vehicles. The red Beetle increased in speed and then got in front of Gerard’s Mustang, allowing the squealing truck to pass them both. Allowing the vehicle carrying a wounded man in his forties to pass right by the wrong place at the wrong time.

Gerard let go of the steering wheel as his eyes clenched together tightly trying to ward away the pain, and grasped at his searing chest that ached with incomprehensible pain. His rib cage felt as though it were being pried apart piece by piece, his heart trying to escape its prison like a wild animal; he could feel the blood that wasn’t there run down his skin; he could hear the screams that should not have been audible through both of the vehicles, not to mention the noise of the traffic.

And then, just as easily as it had come, it was gone. Gerard opened his eyes and took hold of the steering wheel only a moment before his car went over the guard rail, shaking from the fear and relief that enveloped him as the ambulance passed ahead. This time, he didn’t shout nor curse – he only looked ahead in disbelief and chills. How is that possible? How did that… happen? After all, he knew exactly what had happened – he had felt the pain of the dying man inside the ambulance, just as he had felt the pain of the little girl. But why only pain? Why hadn’t he felt this before, and why was it happening now?

After several minutes of trying to make sense of it all, Gerard decided it would be better unexplained – less of a headache. Save it for a rainy day, so to speak. He looked up as he drove, at the many billboards that were raised above the interstate – ads for McDonalds, health insurance, local attractions, and – he shook his head and blinked as he looked straight ahead again. You’ve got to be f---ing kidding me. There’s no way…

The last billboard that he had read before looking back at the red Beetle that was still rolling onward in front of him had been an ad for the local church. And on the billboard, the following words were printed in elegant, blue script:

”God is jealous, and the Lord revengeth; the Lord revengeth, and is furious; the Lord will take vengeance on his adversaries, and he reserveth wrath for his enemies.”

-----

The hotel was very tidy and extremely elegant-looking – but Gerard paid no attention as he checked in and quickly made his way up to his room. Most of the people that he passed in his haste gave him no trouble – a few, however, were sad or troubled about various things, and he had to deal with the momentary shock of feeling someone else’s pain or worry until reaching his room. But none of it compared with what he had felt as the ambulance had passed him earlier, and perhaps that’s why he was able to take the momentary pain or worry. It wasn’t like getting your chest torn open.

Once in his room, he looked around only for a moment at the nice carpeting and carefully made bed before dropping his bag on the floor and flopping down on the mattress. His thoughts were racing as he lay there, exhausted even though the sun was shining through the slightly parted curtains over his window; Gerard felt as though he was being mocked by the words on the religious billboard, but in all honesty, whose fault had it been? Who had cursed God? When it was all said and done, he knew it was his own fault – but that didn’t help him to make any more sense of the situation. Is that how I was hurting that man? Was he feeling my pain that I felt because of Mikey?

Therein the question lay as another took its place; why did he BITE me? Was he passing this [b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b] curse s--t onto me, or was he just insane? “Or…” Gerard said aloud, in a shaky tone. “Was it because of something more?”

[REVENGE]

Chapter 5

Rain pelted down as Gerard pulled into his driveway, water running down the shingles on houses and dripping from tree leaves. The drive home had been much more uneventful than the drive to the hotel the night before – so uneventful, that until he walked into his house, he’d thought that perhaps he’d been imagining the unwanted empathy altogether. Gerard walked around the house and in through the back door, water dripping from his hair lightly as he entered into the kitchen to find Frank sitting at the counter eating a bowl of cereal.

“What the f--- are you doing here?” Gerard glared at his old friend, frustrated and angered at the thought that it had been Frank who had suggested he go into a forest in the first place.

Frank had been smiling, but the smile soon faded into a confused frown – he took another bite of Rice Crispies, trying to think of what he’d done before asking questions. After he swallowed he still had no idea what he’d done to irritate Gerard so terribly, so he merely took another spoonful of cereal in his mouth and looked at him with a confused expression, hoping for a hint or two to prevent himself from looking like an idiot.

“I was talking to you Frank, not the wall. What are you doing here?” Gerard had taken his leather jacket off and draped it over a chair, turning to look at Frank expectantly. “Well?”

“Uhh… I’m… eating your cereal…” To further verify this, Frank took another spoonful in his mouth, still extremely confused. “What’s your problem? You usually don’t mind if I come over…”

Frank’s confusion and pain hit Gerard like a brick in the face – he felt the mild pain and puzzlement of a friend screaming at him for no apparent reason and the underlying sadness that still lay in the pit of Frank’s stomach – the hollowness which used to be occupied by Mikey. The fact that the empathy nightmare hadn’t merely been a dream only angered Gerard further – and he only had one man to take his rage out on. But before he could start screaming at Frank, he looked more closely at what he was eating, and pain struck him sharply. “That’s not my cereal.” He paused as familiar tears began to run down his face. “It’s Mikey’s.”

Frank still held a spoonful in midair between the bowl and his mouth, stunned, humiliated, and above all, hurt. “Aw, s--t… Gerard I… I didn’t know…”

Gerard stormed out of the room, leaving Frank on his own – he just couldn’t take the memory of his brother sitting at that very same counter, smiling as Gerard told him a joke he’d heard from a friend. Gerard knew it wasn’t the cereal that mattered, he could care less about the cereal – it was about the remembrance. Tears stopped merely leaking out from his eyes and instead began to stream as steady as the pouring rain from the sky outside.

He heard the doorbell ring from across the hall and suddenly realized that he could hear Frank crying as well from the kitchen – what great timing. Gerard marched over to the front door and swung it open with frustration, not even bothering to wipe the tears from his face. Standing in the doorway was the last person on earth he wanted to see – the person who had ruined his life.

Alicia stood in the rain, eyeliner running from her face from either tears or water (or perhaps both) and eyed Gerard with a solemn expression. “Get the f--- out of here. You’re not welcome.”

But before Gerard could slam the door, Alicia grabbed his hand. “Wait. Please. I need to talk to you – I don’t have to come inside. I just have to tell you what happened, what really happened.”

Gerard shook off her hand from his in disgust and paused, thinking. After a moment, he walked outside into the rain with Alicia, numb the cold, and shut the door behind him. “Make it quick.”

“Look…” She started, tears beginning to leak from her saddened eyes. “I wasn’t going to leave Mikey – he only got the wrong idea before I could explain it to him. I thought he was cheating on me… I was so worried, so messed up over it… it turns out he was just arranging Ray’s wedding. I told him that I just needed some time alone and he just took it the wrong way. Gerard, don’t f---ing think for a second I didn’t love him – I loved him more than anyone else in the world. I would give anything to have him back, but it wasn’t what you think it was… I wasn’t going to divorce him, or… or… or get rid of him, or anything… I just…”

“So he died for NO REASON?” Gerard’s rage took hold of him, overpowering the pain. “HE DIED BECAUSE YOU WERE TOO STUPID TO JUST ASK HIM WHAT WAS GOING ON?” He screamed, his body beginning to shake with unquestionable anger. Alicia started to sob even more, irritating the beast within Gerard to a further extent. “STOP CRYING! YOU DON’T DESERVE TO CRY! YOU KILLED HIM, THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!”

Gerard put his hands to his forehead, trying not to go insane. Something was rising within him, something that was never meant to be unveiled from it’s resting place. He started to shake violently with such rage that it was unreal to him, numbing him to Alicia’s pain, which he felt only as an annoyance. Before he knew what was happening, he lunged at Alicia, bringing her down to the ground beneath him – their clothes sopping wet, mud staining the back of Alicia’s shirt. Gerard came back to reality as he saw that his mouth was a mere inch away from her throat, wanting to go closer; the beast within him wanted more than the pain of others; it wanted the flesh as well – it wanted to spread the sickness.

[REVENGE]

Chapter 6

The surrounding scenery of houses and trimmed bushes all melted together as if they were merely one painting as the beast within Gerard raged and made itself known. The impulse to rip Alicia’s neck open was all too great – it took all of Gerard’s energy to hold himself an inch away, the sickness of empathy longing to be spread, longing to make others pained with the grief of the world. He seemed to hang suspended in time as he tried to reason with himself, the only clear things in the world around him his own hands that were pinning Alicia to the ground and Alicia herself. Everything else was melted and distorted, deformed and put together again like drying candle wax upon a foreign surface.

Nothing in this false world of thought mattered to Gerard except the choice laid in front of him – to pass this disease of pain and torture onto a woman whom was responsible for the death of his brother, responsible for everything, or to regain control and let her go. But the truth of the matter was that this was not his choice to make – the sickness that fueled the beast within him had already made that for him. The calling of the taste of blood and flesh, the sweet revenge of torturous means that was only an inch away, the screams that would make him smile as the blood dripped from his chin…

If Frank hadn’t opened the real door and slammed it behind him, bringing Gerard out of the melted and distorted world and back into reality, Alicia would have very well met the worst of fates – the fate of pain and grief only distributed by the rulers of both Heaven and Hell. Frank stepped over into the rain where Alicia lay on the ground, Gerard’s hands pressing roughly against her shoulders to keep her pinned down. Alicia was screaming – but Gerard hadn’t heard a thing. Nothing but the raging inaudible call of the sickness that served as Hell for the [b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b]ed living.

“Gerard what the hell are you doing?!” Frank’s eyes were wide with shock and confusion, still slightly puffy from the crying he had done.

Coming back into reality, Gerard raised his head away from her neck and turned to look Frank in the eyes. As he looked back at Alicia, he saw that she was crying so violently she was near to choking. He stood up, the rain still beating down furiously, and spoke as she rose and began to back away. “Just get out of here. Never come back.”

Alicia didn’t need to be told twice. She ran down the street, the sheets of rain not slowing her down in the least. Gerard watched her go with slight guilt and horror at what he had almost done – he’d almost given the horrible gift he now possessed to someone else. No one f---ing deserves this – not even the person I hate the most. Frank still stood outside the door, staring at Gerard with another confused expression that almost mirrored the one from the kitchen – only this time, he was fearful as well. It’s the look in his eyes… that animalistic look…

“Mind explaining what just happened? I came to find you and apologize but I’m not too sure on that anymore.” Frank watched as Gerard turned to look him in the eyes.

“I just… lost my temper, that’s all… I’m just hurt Frank, okay? That’s all. My brother died, what do you expect me to do?” Gerard’s face hardened into the same frustrated mask as before as he tried to walk past Frank and in through the front door.

Frank stood in his way. “Well I sure as hell don’t expect you to go around attacking people like a f---ing crazy guy.” As he spoke, he looked into his friend’s eyes curiously, trying to judge if the animal-like craze within them was merely an illusion.

“Maybe if you’d stay out of my life and quit eating my dead brother’s cereal you wouldn’t have to see me acting like a crazy guy.” Gerard pushed Frank out of the way and slammed the front door shut behind him, leaving his old friend out in the rain to his thoughts.

Frank knew something was wrong – not only did the Alicia incident prove it, but something just felt wrong. The way that Gerard’s eyes shifted slyly as if he was hiding something, the way that the primitive craze had been revealed, the way that his attitude was so extremely defensive, and that suddenly he hated Frank with a passion when he had left to try and calm himself with his friend’s advice. The way that he was so unlike Gerard – even after Mikey’s death he hadn’t acted in such ways before his return.

While Frank pondered over the sudden changes in Gerard, not bothering to get out of the rain, Gerard was busy trying to get a grip on his mind as it raced dangerously. I can’t let this spread… I can’t let this infect other people…But the beast said otherwise – oh, yes… the beast wanted infections, it wanted flesh – and most of all, it wanted blood.

[REVENGE]

Chapter 7

The phone just wouldn’t stop ringing; Frank’s soggy Rice Crispies still sat on the counter, untouched for hours; the rain beat down on the house as it had on the night of Mikey’s death – nothing was in Gerard’s favor as he sat in a small corner of the living room in the fetal position, his eyes closed and his lips pursed. He’d been sitting like that for the past few hours, trying to drown out the sound of Frank’s never-ending phone call attempts. Only God knew what he wanted – and only God cared. Gerard wanted nothing to do with him, especially now that he’d saw him attack Alicia. In Gerard’s eyes, all that was happening was all Frank’s fault.

After Frank had left, things had gotten pretty freaky. Gerard was not rocking back and forth in the corner of the living room to merely try and sooth the sickness that had taken over almost all of his body – he was trying to quiet the voices that had sprung up in the absence of other people. Voices that were not familiar to him, voices that recited strange things, voices that reminded him of the billboard that he had saw on the way to his hotel room the other day. The voices had the tones of little children singing in unison and they just wouldn’t stop.

God is jealous, and the Lord revengeth; the Lord revengeth, and is furious; the Lord will take vengeance on his adversaries, and he reserveth wrath for his enemies.

Go away. Please, just go away… you don’t exist… it’s all in my head. But they wouldn’t listen – no matter what Gerard did or thought, the voices never rested. The phone never stopped ringing. The rain never stopped beating.

When the Lord thy God shall enlarge thy border, as he hath promised thee, and thou shalt say, I will eat flesh, because thy soul longeth to eat flesh; thou mayest eat flesh, whatsoever thy soul lusteth after.

The world seemed to spin every time that Gerard dared to open his frightened eyes; everything seemed to come to life, everything moved as it was never meant to. The phone continued ringing and the rain continued beating; the voices continued speaking.

Thou shalt not do so unto the Lord thy God: for every abomination to the Lord, which he hateth, have they done unto their gods; for even their sons and their daughters they have burnt in the fire to their Gods.

If this spreads, the apocalypse is the only thing that could possibly happen – the entire world would change, they would feel the most secret of pains and miseries, the world would be a living Hell. Then, a terrible thought crossed his mind. What if this is meant to be the end? What if I’m an abomination to God and I’m meant to spread this, meant to cause the end of the world? Meant to cause destruction? He recalled, in tears, the day he had cursed God, the day that his miseries had gotten the best of him. Mikey’s not in Hell… he can’t be… And this was finally the truth, his brother was not in hell; but Gerard was. Gerard began screaming as the phone began ringing again and the voices began singing again, still unable to drown them out.

Namely, of the gods of the people which are round about you, nigh unto thee, or far off from thee, from the one end of the earth even unto the other end of the earth; Thou shalt not consent unto him, nor hearken unto him; neither shalt thou spare, neither shalt thou conceal him: But thou shalt surely kill him; thine hand shall be first upon him to put him to death, and afterwards the hand of all the people.

Gerard stood up and ran across the room to where the phone sat ringing; he couldn’t take this anymore. He had to get rid of at least one noise, at least one. Answering the phone in a shaky tone, he spoke into the receiver. “Hello?”

Frank’s voice rang out from the other end of the line. “Gerard, where the hell have you been? I’ve been trying to get a hold of you all [b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b] night.”

“Oh I’ve just been… listening to music and… and painting. I couldn’t hear the phone. What do you want?”

The noticeable difference in contrast to how violent and enraged Gerard had been earlier to how calm and shaky he seemed now didn’t pass Frank’s attention – but for the moment, he let it lie. “I was only calling because I got a really good idea. I’m not sure if you’re… really up to it, or if it would make you too uncomfortable to talk about it. But… I was thinking that since MCR seems to be… over, we could have one last show in New York, where you and Mikey saw The Smashing Pumpkins. One last show to honor Mikey.”

Gerard paused, trying to tell Frank’s voice from the ever-increasing audibility of the voices that still sung inside his thoughts. Tears ran down his face as so many times before as he nodded silently to the phone. “Yeah I… I think that’s a great idea. I know we would all be crying half the time but… the fans probably would be too, if they were true. They would understand – they would want a chance to honor him too.”

“So… can you come over by the house tomorrow so I can get Ray and Bob to discuss it with us or… would you rather have it at your place?” Frank paused, waiting for response – the phone line was rather static ridden because of the storm.

Gerard looked around the living room, remembering watching many a horror film with Mikey; he looked in through the hall and into the sliver of kitchen viewable, remembering cooking the nastiest of concoctions in an attempt at food; he stared off into the shadow covered piece of hallway that led up the stairs to Mikey’s bedroom where the most painful of memories lay. He took in a deep breath and sighed into the phone. “Your place would be great. I’ll uh… I’ll be there sometime tomorrow, around midday.”

“Alright – I’ll call the guys and have them come over as well. See you later.”

“Yeah… later.”

The sound of a dial tone met Gerard’s ears before he hung up the phone, walking back into the center of the living room to sit on the stained couch. The ringing of the phone was gone – but the rain and voices remained, unable to sate their thirst for Gerard’s pain and [b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b]ation. The tears increased once more, making his face flush and shine in the glow of the light fixture above his head. Nothing was fair; nothing would end; nothing would send the pain away; nothing could stop the chorus of voices.

The Lord shall send upon thee cursing, vexation, and rebuke, in all that thou settest thine hand unto for to do, until thou be destroyed, and until thou perish quickly; because of the wickedness of thy doings, whereby thou hast forsaken me.

Soon, Gerard began screaming again.

[REVENGE]

Chapter 8

The following day the rain had subsided – Ray, Bob, Frank, and Gerard sat in Frank’s humble living room, eyeing each other in awkward silence. No doubt Frank had told the others about Gerard’s attack at Alicia the day before. The ticking and tocking of the pendulum that swung back and forth in Frank’s Grandfather Clock was the only disturbance of the silence – Gerard tried not to make eye contact with Frank and his eyes dodged around the room curiously. Luckily, the voices had stopped the night before when sleep had come to him – but he was already fearful of their return.

“So, uh… are we gonna sit here like idiots staring at each other or are we going to talk about something?” Bob asked, looking around the room.

“Uh… yeah…” Frank shifted nervously in his chair. “You guys know how Gerard and Mikey went to see The Smashing Pumpkins a long time ago before the band started, and they told us how great it was? How Mikey always remembered how he loved it?”

A murmur of yeses and nods were exchanged. “Okay well… I don’t think it’s a secret that this band is over. It just wouldn’t ever be the same without Mikey, as Gerard’s already said – but I think one final show to honor him there in New York where Mikey had such a great time would be a good send off. I know it would be a very… emotional show, for all of us, the fans included – but I still think it would be a great way to honor our friend. Honor his memory, and the memory of this band as well.”

Silence resumed its duty as Frank fell quiet, waiting for response. After a few moments, Ray spoke. “Yeah… I… I think that would be great. We could get Mikey’s old fill-in to play the bass and all… Bob?”

Bob sat on one end of the couch, staring down at his hands that lay in his lap. Without looking up, he spoke as well. “I’ll probably be crying most of the time… but I’ll play the drums until my hands bleed if it’s for Mikey.”

Frank smiled. “Then it’s decided – I’ll call Brian later and have him set up a date. Until then… I guess… that’s all that needs to be discussed.”

He paused, seeing that no one had anything else to say. “Err… Ray, is your wedding still on?”

Ray looked blankly down at his feet. “It’s been postponed… until… well, until later. We don’t know when. Whenever we all feel like being happy again. Mikey was going to help but… as of now, it looks like we’re just going to wait.”

Silence again – none of them were ready to talk about it, about Mikey. Perhaps after the final show they could start healing, but until then… it seemed as though they needed to be miserable for a while to get over it all. The saddest part of it all was that Gerard couldn’t even properly be miserable in the state he was in – the state of half-assed sanity, confusion, paranoia, and an empathetic nightmare.

“I’ll see you guys later.” Gerard stood up and walked out of the house, leaving the others to their thoughts. Probably leaving them to talk about me. He glanced wearily at the overcast sky, fearful that the rain would return and bring the voices back as well. Walking down the sidewalk, he met several people – thankfully none of them recognized him nor felt over agonizing emotions. But the last person he met walking back home would change the course of his thinking – it would change the course of everything.

A small girl, no older than the age of five, stood in the middle of the sidewalk, blonde curly hair running down her back and accenting the light pink dress she wore. She looked up at Gerard with bright blue eyes full of curiosity, then to the right where a white house sat. That must be where she lives – what’s she doing out here by herself? There are rapists and murderers and all kinds of bad… His train of thought altered. There are people like me out here.

Gerard returned her stare and looked deep into her eyes – as he did so, he felt her fear build with every passing second. The voices had gone away, that was quite obvious – but the sickness remained, deeply dug within Gerard’s soul. Feeling her fear rise as he looked into her eyes gave him a sort of sick pleasure; he wondered why she didn’t simply run away. Her bottom lip quivered slightly – but she didn’t cry as Gerard expected. She regained control of herself and held still, looking into his eyes almost challengingly.

He felt the familiar numbing sensation altering his sense of right and wrong, altering his human feelings and replacing it with something else entirely. The sickness called to the beast that had been resting deep inside him, called and awoke it easily. Gerard could suddenly taste the blood, the flesh, the fear and the screams… and he loved it all. Loved it so much that for a moment it frightened him – then, the numbing sensation took over and soon rid him of his fears. Rid him of everything except the lovely promise of such a sweet and tasteful sin… The young girl still bore into Gerard’s eyes with a challengingly calm expression.

And Gerard took her up on that challenge with a smile.

[REVENGE]

Chapter 9

The girl’s face became twisted and contorted as she screamed, unable to escape from Gerard’s strong grasp. No one came out of the houses to interfere or try and save the innocent young one – no one took heed of her screams. Blood stained her pink dress as Gerard dug his teeth deep into her neck, savoring the taste that was even better than his imagination had let on. The crimson sin ran into his mouth and down his throat; his arms were wrapped around her shoulders and neck; she was screaming, but no one heard.

The blood dripped from his chin and pattered onto the sidewalk like evil rain droplets, splattering and staining everything it came into contact with. Soon, the girl’s screams subsided; soon, there was no more blood to be had. Gerard loosened his grip and the girl fell to the sidewalk, cold, alone, gone. Her arm fell to the side of her body, sprawled out. Her fingers curled slightly as her heart stopped – her blue eyes lay open, haunting, cold and dead. The pink dress she wore had turned red, still warm from the lost blood that had escaped Gerard’s mouth.

The little girl was dead. Gerard stepped away, looking down with his mouth agape at what he’d done. Looking down at his hands, he saw they were blood stained as well. He felt of his face – it was warm with the life he had stolen. What have I done? Gerard looked into the girl’s eyes, all challenging aspects gone from her expression. Now, she lay limp, the opposition victorious – and what a hollow victory it was.

Gerard didn’t know what to do – he stood above her corpse for a few moments, and knew that soon people would be looking out their windows, taking glances at his features so the police would know the murderer. So he did the only sensible thing he could do – he ran away. Home was the only safe place for him now, and even then there was no guarantee he wouldn’t be caught.

Lightening flashed in his wake, illuminating the sinful scene that lay behind him. As he ran down the sidewalk, he took notice of every house he passed, wondering which one would be his demise, which one would seal his fate – which home owner would see him sprinting down the block guiltily with blood staining his face and hands. But no one stopped him – he arrived home and slammed the door behind him, his breathing heavy and uneven.

What Gerard had done was so foreign and twisted to him that in a way it felt like it had been a dream, like his moment of insanity had never even happened – but the blood that was drying on his hands said otherwise. Hastily, he ran to the bathroom and stripped his clothes away from his skin, turning the shower on and letting the water warm. After a few moments, he stepped in and began scrubbing every square inch of his body, praying that it would rid him of the memories as well as the stains. The blood stained the water into a brownish tint before running down the drain and disappearing – but regardless of how far it traveled away from Gerard’s physical being, the girl’s blood would still stain him in ways that water would never be able to wash away.

After he’d washed himself three times over and scrubbed his hands and face until they were raw with pain, Gerard stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel. He dried off and then wrapped it around his torso, then walked over to the sink. The mirror that hung above it revealed that although his skin was now extremely red from the washing, all the blood was gone – or so he thought. He realized after a few seconds of standing there that he could still taste it in his mouth; grimacing, he reached for his toothbrush. The worst part of it all was not that he could still taste her life; it was the fact that he was savoring it before he could stop himself. He ran his tongue along his gums and between his teeth, enjoying the taste of it all.

What the hell is wrong with me? Gerard put toothpaste upon his toothbrush and then began scrubbing the inside of his mouth even more vigorously than he had his body. Soon, his own gums were bleeding; he spit into the sink. His saliva was pink, along with the once white bristles of the toothbrush. Hastily, he rinsed it down the drain of the sink, cleaning his toothbrush until most of the pink had faded away.

He did this cleansing with everything. He took a toothpick and scraped the dried blood out from underneath his fingernails; he washed his clothes, rinsing away the sinful stains; he even smeared his tears across his cheeks, as if giving reason to nasty red rawness that had befallen his face. Soon, he sat upon the couch in his living room, dressed in jeans and black t-shirt, wanting nothing more than to disappear from the earth entirely. Childlike voices began singing more biblical verses; Gerard swore that another girl was singing with them. The little girl is singing with them…

For their feet run to evil, and make haste to shed blood.

That simple line they spoke in unison – then fell silent, as before. Gerard buried his face in his hands; this isn’t real. None of this is real. Maybe I’m not even real. A simple battery operated clock ticked away in the corner of the room. Time could be both a thing of complication and a thing of simplicity; to Gerard, the world would soon die in only a matter of time. Miseries and desires exposed, harmful feelings and painful experiences shared among all, the world would most certainly come to an end. The young girl hadn’t lived to carry the sickness on like Gerard had. She’d died there on the sidewalk, where the police would surely soon find her. Wouldn’t they? The people of the world continued to go on about their daily lives; it was only a matter of time.

Tick… tick… tick…

[Wanted Penguin]

Wow, this is a really powerful story you're writing here. It's great so far. I can't wait for chapter ten. :] I love all your stories... I don't know what else to say! Really looking forward to the next chapter and I adore your mcr stories :D

[REVENGE]

Thanks. xD I'm actually surprised that someone read it. So thank you. x)

Chapter 10

“Yeah, Brian says he set up a date for tomorrow. It took him a week, but we’ve got it all put together. … You okay Gerard?”

Gerard sat in his living room, the phone pressed against his ear tightly. “Yeah, I’m good. I’m glad we’re doing this – I think it’s something that just… needs to be done, you know?”

It had been a week since the incident with the little girl; Gerard hadn’t left the house, his body had gone into shock. Today was the first day he’d even really been able to get out of bed and face the world.

Frank sighed on the other end of the phone. “Look… I know something’s up with you. I’m your friend, Gerard. You don’t have to hide anything from me. I’m only here to help you.”

Gerard shook his head, regardless of the fact that his friend couldn’t see. “No, Frank, I’m fine. Really – I’m ready to play this show. It’s been like, what, two weeks? I’m never going to get over … what happened, so it doesn’t matter when this thing takes place. I think it’ll be a healing process for all of us.”

“No… that isn’t what I’m talking about. You just seem so… so different. Like the day that you came in and screamed at me, and then you attacked Alicia. I mean seriously, Gerard, yeah she had a part to play in his death, but you can’t go around doing that to people. What if someone had saw you? You’d be on the front page of Kerrang looking like you were about to murder someone…”

Gerard flinched slightly. I did murder someone, Frank… I did. “I’m fine; I just… sort of had a nervous breakdown. It happens – I mean, I guess I just needed someone to take my anger out on. I’m sorry – we’re cool now, right?”

All was quiet for a moment; then Frank signed again. “Yeah… we’re cool. It’s hard to hold a grudge against someone when they’ve… witnessed something so… tragic.”

For a moment, Gerard thought that Frank was talking about the little girl; he almost blurted out that he was wrong, that nothing happened; then he realized that he was only talking about Mikey.

“Anyways, I never asked you about your trip. What happened?”

“Oh… err… nothing, really.” Gerard absentmindedly pressed his hand against his neck; he felt nothing but smooth skin, almost as if the nightmare had never happened. “I just… sort of walked around, cried a little… I don’t know. I think I was just sore with you when I got back because being alone in a strange place actually made me think of Mikey more than being at home.”

“Yeah… I understand.”

Gerard looked out of his picture window that was on the right side of the front door as Frank continued talking; a few cars passed, a normality of the day; a couple of flashes of lightening illuminated the pavement and scenery; a little girl walked quietly and steadily behind an oblivious man, her pink, blood-stained dress accenting her blonde hair.
Gerard screamed.

“Gerard, what the F--- was THAT?” Frank sounded exasperated; the last thing he wanted to hear was more drama.

“Uhh… nothing… sorry… I uh… I have to go.” He hung up the phone before Frank could reply and ran across the room, opening the door and running across the lawn as he looked at the girl that had been dead a mere week ago. Her blue eyes shifted curiously from Gerard to the man in front of her. She smiled sweetly at Gerard before turning back to the man; his stomach turned. The young girl lost her footing and fell on her back, looking pitifully innocent.

“Ow… hey… Mister… wait – can you help me up?” The man turned around and saw the girl lying on the sidewalk; then he saw her dress.

“Dear God! What the hell happened to you?”

“It hurts…” She grimaced and the man’s face fell.

“Here… I’ll help you up. It’s okay.”

The man knelt down and picked the girl up in his arms, as if hugging her; Gerard couldn’t scream to warn him before it was too late. The girl sunk her teeth deeply into the neck of the man, just as Gerard had done; the man screamed, just as she had. This is so f---ed up… this just can’t be happening… she’s supposed to be DEAD!

The girl didn’t drain the man completely; she only took about as much blood as the man from the forest had taken from Gerard, and then let him scurry away, screaming and holding his hand to his neck where the blood still flowed from the gaping hole. She looked up at Gerard with her hollow blue eyes, wiping the blood away from her mouth with her hand. She smiled as Gerard began crying; It’s happening… the infection is f---ing happening…

The girl walked over to Gerard and took his hand within hers; he flinched at the chill that consumed her, like she’d been lying in ice for days. Again, she smiled up at him; Gerard knelt down, feeling weak, and she gently wiped away his falling tears with her icy fingers.

“You’re supposed to be dead.” He choked out in-between sobs.
“I am; just as you are.” Her blue eyes shone brightly; the same eyes that had looked so lifeless only a week before.

Gerard couldn’t take this; this insanity, this desecrated nightmare. He fled away from the young girl’s touch in terror; his tears weren’t of saddened nature, but of fear and fear alone.

“It’s only a matter of time.” She called out after him, her tone light and eerily cheery.

As Gerard entered his house and fled into the corner of his living room that had become his shelter, he buried his face in his hands and began screaming among his tears. Screaming and crying were the only actions he knew anymore; they were the only things that made any sense. And as the clock continued to tick, the young girl went on her merry way, and the sickness began taking over the unfortunate man from the sidewalk, Gerard knew that there was nothing he could do to stop the whirlwind of terror. He pressed his hand against his chest; and felt nothing. No beating, no faint murmur of life. How long had it been since he’d eaten real food? How long had it been since he’d really felt alive?

I’m already dead… and this is only the beginning of the end.

It’s merely a matter of time…

[REVENGE]

Chapter 11

It was raining again as Gerard sat on the memorable bus that was making its way to Madison Square Garden in New York, where My Chemical Romance would be playing their final show. The rest of the guys were lying in their bunks, not speaking to one another; to Gerard, that was too painful. Mikey’s bunk was right across from his. How the others could stand it, he didn’t know nor did he care; he had other things to think about.

Tonight, he would be playing his final show in front of hundreds of thousands of fans in honor of his late brother; and he would be doing it without a heartbeat. He was dead, yet he was living – he was still here. Where was his casket? Where was his funeral? Where was his tombstone? The answers lie right in front of his eyes. You will never get any of those things; you’re [b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b]ed. The [b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b][b][color=red]- PLEASE REPORT ME FOR SWEARING!!! -[/color][/b]ed never get those honors in death. They die… and live forever. They help to spread the sickness; they help to feed the beast.

Gerard couldn’t even cry anymore; he cried until all his tears had gone away. It was as if he was numb to the fact that he shouldn’t exist; but that was alright for the moment. Tonight, he would cry more than enough to make up for it. Frank came out of his bunk and walked across the bus to sit by Gerard on the familiar couch, sighing as he did so.

Gerard eyed him nervously.

“So… are you… ready for tonight?” Frank chose his words carefully.

“Yeah… yeah, I’m ready. You?”

Frank nodded. “Yeah… I think we’re all going to make this show the best of the best for Mikey. I looked on the internet a couple hours ago on my laptop and it looks like the fans are going f---ing crazy over it; I’m not really sure whether it’s because of Mikey or because it’s our last show, but tickets are selling on eBay for big bucks. Kinda freaky, really…”

“Yeah. I remember taking Mikey to see The Smashing Pumpkins here about twelve years ago… God, he was so f---ing happy. The show was so amazing…”

“Heh, I bet. Ol’ Billy Corgan never failed to entertain.”

Gerard smiled slightly. “You know, out of all the shows and s--t that I’ve seen… I think that one was my favorite. Only because of the look on his face. I’d never saw him so… so… happy. He told me that night that he wanted to do what they did; he wanted to make people as happy as they’d made him.”

Frank smiled. “Well… he sure as hell did.”

For a moment, one indescribably sweet moment, Gerard was happy. For the first time in weeks, he smiled and actually meant it. “Yeah. … He did.” Then the moment faded until it became faint and weary; it melted away, consumed by the mass of pain and insanity that enveloped Gerard’s mind.

“I think you’ll like this show, Gerard. I’ve got a surprise for you; well… for you, and for Mikey as well.”

“Oh?” He was only halfway paying attention while Frank spoke.

“Yep. It took a lot of connections, phone calls, and efforts, but in the end I know it’ll be worth it.”

Gerard only smiled at his friend, not daring to say anything for fear of saying the wrong thing; this time, the smile wasn’t true.

For some reason, as he let his vision and mind wander out of one of the windows on the bus, staring out into nothingness, familiar lyrics from an old Nirvana song started playing around in his mind.

She eyes me like a pisces when I am weak
I’ve been locked inside your heart shaped box for weeks
I’ve been drawn into your magnet tar pit trap
I wish I could eat your cancer when you turn black…

If only he could’ve taken away the pain from Mikey, if only he could’ve found a way to soothe and comfort him somehow, like he’d done so many times before… but he hadn’t. His death had started a chain reaction of unthinkable consequences, consequences that no one in this world was ready to face. For as always… suicide held nothing in relief; only the false promise of release from the pain, when in reality, it only caused so much more…

Meat-eating orchids forgive no one just yet
Cut myself on angel hair and baby’s breath
Broke hymen of your highness I’m left black
Throw down your umbilical noose so I can climb right back

Gerard all too fondly remembered his suicidal days. What would’ve happened if he’d actually succeeded in death? How many people would he have hurt, how badly would he have harmed Mikey? What right did he have to make such a choice that would not affect only him, but so many others as well? The answer was simple: he didn’t have the right. No one did; yet so many people went through with it anyway.

Hey!
Wait!
I got a new complaint.
Forever in debt to your priceless advice
Your advice

In mere hours he would be living the last of his dream; to sing, to help others. He knew of what would befall the earth in a matter of years, yet there was nothing he could do. He was dead, he was cold, he was gone; but he would never be able to see his brother again. Not even in Hell; for he knew what Hell looked like now, and he was in it. Mikey was long gone, six feet under, and Gerard would forever be cursed to walk the earth as a helper of the beast, of the sickness. Maybe once everything was said and done everyone would be able to die; was that possible? Gerard didn’t know. All he did know was that regardless of the pain and remorse he felt in his heart, there was no stopping the beast in his mind and in his soul that longed for more blood, more pain, more infection. More Hell.

Forever in debt to your priceless advice…

[Wanted Penguin]

I love what what you've done so far. The last chapter's especially gripping :] as always I cannot wait for more... :)

edit: your rank under your name is making me lma0! XD Its just so funny; it doesn't fit you at all :D

[Frozen Angel]

It's very, very well-written. What I like about your style of writing is that you allow the reader to actually feel your story and all the excitement, suspense and agony in it. It's a great job done, NirvanaGirl. And I love it.

P.S. What makes me like it even more is that you included my name.

Edit: I printed it out and showed it to a friend. She said it was great. And she counted 24 f words inside lol.